10 other essential things

I still find myself browsing through the pictures of old. But i guess my favorite is the part where I don’t feel any more pain.  Just pure happiness for all the things we have done together. Just pure joy that no matter the ending, I have no regrets because we experienced what we did. I know I came out stronger. For you, I have no idea how you took it but I hope the lessons serve you well someday.

I kept asking you to widen your understanding, broaden the horizon and grow up. We’re not kids anymore though not yet full pledged adults as well. I hope that, although we’re each other’s first “LOVE” gone awry,  you still smile back at me when I flash you a smile at Dapitan street. I hope that you say “hi” back to my friends when they greet you because they mean the world to me as much as you did then. And I hope you can find it in your heart to love truly again as much as you did when we were together.

Just always remember that there’s more to a relationship than two people who loves each other.

So what are the other essential things apart from love you ask?

  1. Faithfulness to your partner – there’s a reason why this is number 1. If you’re gonna run around as if you’re a single fuck, well heck just get out of a current commitment and run free. You wouldn’t want your girl to be unfaithful to you either because then you guys would just be fooling yourselves.
  2. Contentment – you gotta love what you have baby. Know her worth and give importance to her as long as you still can. You’re never assured of tomorrow. You’ll never know the things you will lose the next day. Might as well do it all today in case a next time doesn’t come your way.
  3. Courage – to do the things you’ve never done or those that do not make you comfortable. Go out of your way now and then just to show how much she means to you.
  4. Trust – this is to keep her on the leash while letting her explore the world as well. You wouldn’t want her to blame you someday for not having experienced all the things that she needs to while she’s still young. NEVER hold her back because if she’s yours, it’s only you and to only you will she go home to at the end of the day.
  5. Patience – because not everything will go your way  and even when it doesn’t, that doesn’t mean you’re just gonna quit. Wait for her outside her building without complaining, pick her up late at night when she’s doing school work without nagging how late it is every second. Support her when she needs it most and NEVER push her to do the things she doesn’t want to do. Gently guide her to where you know she’s supposed to be and be patient in the process.
  6. Selfless – because pride and being self-centered in a relationship will get you nowhere. You just might as well be single if you’re always gonna think about only yourself, your gains and your interests. She’s human same as you with her own dreams, aspirations and preferences. Before doing anything else, weigh her part as much as you do yours. There’s nothing wrong with differences and there’s no need to be a martyr. That’s why the next number is important. 
  7. Understanding – beyond your limits because you love her that much. Be mature enough to listen to her and her explanations. There’s nothing wrong with assuming. Whether you’re right or wrong, it hurts either way. Allow her to give her side of the story and while she’s at it, LISTEN. Actually listen. Don’t let her explain if you’re not even intending to honor her explanation. Open your mind and try to put yourself in her place. Don’t be selfish. Consider where she’s coming from and everything will follow through.
  8. Respect – respect who she is. Respect her enough not to cheat on her. Respect her enough to treat her right, to protect her from all the other people who wants to harm her, to honor the promises you’ve made and respect her enough to always have her back (and only hers) always. Respect her enough not to make her cry, not to hurt her intentionally and most of all, respect her enough to be honest.
  9. Honesty – is still the best policy and there’s not a damn thing you can do about it, hon. Even if you think that she doesn’t need to know because it’s just a minor detail, don’t keep it. Tell it! Chances are she’ll find out eventually and you wouldn’t want her to have anything against you when an argument comes up. Play it safe and don’t take chances. Play it clean so you’ll never have to worry about anything at all. If ever you did something wrong, tell her immediately. You don’t want bad news of you coming from other people. That would hurt more and she doesn’t deserve that.
  10. Smarts – love never required foolishness. Those people who consign to stupidity are fools entirely. Leave what doesn’t serve you, makes you grow or makes you happy. Love makes EVERYONE irrational. BREAK THE TREND AND USE YOUR HEAD.

It’s okay to feel lost sometimes. But don’t make it a habit to wait for people to pull you out of your own absurdity. You gotta do it on your own because you’re the only one who’s always gonna be there for yourself.

YET

Don’t forget the most important thing.

LOVE:

Love her enough to be faithful to her, to be contented with what she is, to trust her, to be patient with her, to respect her and to be honest with her. Love her enough to accept her for who she is; enough to have the courage to do the things you never even imagined you’d do; enough to understand her and to go beyond your limits for her. Love her enough to hold her when she cries; enough to hug her tight when she has had a bad day; enough to let her sing her heart out in public no matter how awful she sings without being embarrassed; and enough to hold on even when giving up seems like the only option.

But most of all? Love her enough not to use your pride on her; enough to humble yourself, to accept your mistakes and to make it up to her. NEVER tell her the number of girls with a crush on you because you’re most probably not the only guy who likes her as well. She chose you so listen to her and treat her right. Quit being insecure and do not take her for granted. Show her everyday how much she means to you even after you’ve gotten her. Prove to her that she made the right choice. Do it all. Because these are all the things I hoped you would’ve done when we were together.

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